The Return of the Prodigal Son

Well, well well.

It looks like the ladies will have one more reason to lean a little closer to the washing machine come September… Adam Rodriguez will reprise his long-standing role as Eric Delko on CSI Miami.  If you count yourself as one of the 14 million viewers each week, you can appreciate the impact of such an announcement.  After all, it took 2 new guys to fill the Sizzling Latino’s shoes, right?

How will this work?  Will Eddie Cibrian stay on as the less-than average Jessie Cardoza?  Will we be looking at a Jay Leno/Conan O’Brien situation?  Adam’s new gig got cancelled, so he gets first dibs at his old job? Not that I’m complaining! Personally, I would like to see Adam walk onto the set and slap Eddie in the back of the head with a dead trout.  “Hey Eddie: BAM (dead trout action), that’s for making all ridiculously good-looking actors look bad!  There’s more to us than what’s under our shirts… WHY do you suck so bad?”

Back to the real situation at hand.  What will Eric’s return do to the CSI Miami chemistry? The show already has the Master of Machismo, the Maker of Mojo, the gravitational epicenter of gravitas…. … yes, obviously I am referring to the intoxicating manliness that is David Caruso. Before Eric left, he was the rising student, the boy wonder – we could all see his future greatness. How does a young lion return to its pride after so long… There is barely enough room for another macho man on the show, and certainly not two?

What are the script team’s options?  I’ve got a few suggestions:

A)    Eddie Cibrian’s ‘Jessie’ gets sent to work the beat at the slightly less famous GPD – you know, up in Gnome, Alaska.  The transfer is necessitated by the recent – super unfortunate – dead trout related injury. I see a very touching, slow motion scene unfold:  very dramatic music playing as wet trout collides, and the falling down action unfolds. Super impactful scene, really. And of course we’re all saddened to learn that due to the Alaskan climate, his shirt must be worn AT ALL TIMES.

B)    Adam Rodriguez returns to MDPD and assumes his badass role as Eric Delko.  Is Jessie still around?  No one will notice.

C)    Eddie Cibrian returns to his roots and replaces another child on The Young and The Restless. You know how that works… a 9 year old kid goes to summer camp and comes home as a 40 year old – wiser and more drug addled – and ready to commence his adult Soap opera career as a swarthy philandering, action hero.

At the end of the day, do we really care what happens to ‘dimples’?  Stay, go… whatever.  If you’re anything like me, you come for the shades.  I assume most of us do.  As long as Horatio keeps squinting his way into our hearts, and growling his way into our fantasies, most of us will be more than happy to marry him... I mean keep watching.  

Dina Out.